I was allowed back home on Friday afternoon. Praise God that my place is still standing and that the damage is very minimal. The strangest thing of all is that it looks like nothing happened. Aside from piles of ashes on my balcony and some ash inside from a window that didn’t seal, everything is normal. And that’s hard to process. My outside plants died, from the heat and the soot. My apartment smells like smoke, but it’s airing out OK. The houses of my two aunts are also still standing. It truly is a miracle.
Yesterday I did at least 5 loads of laundry and then JS came over and we rented Transformers (coincidentally, it was quite good! I was shocked. I think Michael Bay is the anti-Christ of the film industry). Today I vacuumed, dusted, swept, febreezed, and got new plants. I’ll have to steam clean the carpets, but I’m totally OK with that.
So here’s how it happened, for me.
SUNDAY
JS and I get up and have breakfast. We decide to head to Julian to take some pictures of the fall leaves, which were supposed to be at their peak. We check the weather - it’s supposed to be windy, very windy, but we figure that we don’t have to go hiking, we can just stop on the side of the road to get our pictures. And so we go.
As we get within 20 miles of Julian, I notice a billow of black smoke, but it’s hard to tell just where it is or how far away it is. And, not to sound callous, fires in this part of SoCal aren’t that uncommon, but they can be put out pretty quickly, so I wasn’t worried. So we keep driving.
As we pass through Ramona, the billow of smoke has spread. The Eastern sky is now almost all black, and pieces of ash begin to fall on the car. After each hill we drive over, I think that we’ve passed the fire, but in truth, we never even get to it. Soon we reach a police barricade. JS and I pull over, and I take these pictures. The wind is gusting at least 60 mph, and I freak out and get in the car, begging JS to leave.
On our way out, I look behind us, and I can see the orange flames sprinting down the hillside where we had just parked. We pass maybe half a dozen fire trucks on our way back to town.
It’s about 2:00 when we get back to my neighborhood, so we decide to eat. We park at a Chevy’s, and the air is so filled with smoke that my eyes water during the walk from the car to the door. I go to the restroom to wash my hands, and the sink is filled with ash and soot. I decide to pack up the dog and go spend the night at JS’s place in Del Mar until the smoke clears in the morning.
Del Mar is no better, as far as the air quality goes. I take Tonks out for a potty break, but she’s too freaked out by the ash and won’t go. She pees inside, but neither one of us cares. It’s pretty damn scary out there. In less than an hour, the fire went from a distant plume of smoke to nearly overtaking our car to pushing me out of my house, 45 miles away. Over dinner JS and I discuss the idea of me going home in the morning and collecting a few belongings like my Birth Certificate, passport, and some photos.
At 10:30, I have a small panic attack and tell JS that I want to go home and get my stuff now, just in case. We both think it’s premature, but JS says that whatever I want to do, he’s coming with me. We put Tonks in her crate to go to sleep and get in my car. The news is on every radio station, and as we drive, they announce that Poway is under mandatory evacuation. Poway is just East of me. I call 3 of my cousins who live in the same complex. I only get a hold of one, who was sleeping. I explain the fires and beg her to go to her parents house, just for the night. I tell her to pack all of her important papers. She says she’ll just see how things are in the morning and I tear up in the car. She calls me right back, though, and says she’s going to leave now, but do I really think it’s that bad?
We park the car and run inside, with rags over out mouths, to get what we can from my place. I find my papers, grab an old childhood book and all of my photos and load them in my car. Then we get the hell out. It’s almost too smokey to see.
Back as JS’s place, I fall asleep on his lap to the news playing in the background.
MONDAY
At 5:00AM I wake up to take Tonks out. She manages to pee outside, and I give her a tasty treat. She’s very proud. Back inside, I turn on the news. The fires have split. They’ve crossed I-15, the freeway I live off of. They’re also burning near the Wild Animal Park, where my 2 Aunt’s live, and were my cousin just evacuated to. I wake up JS, sobbing, and we watch the news together. My place was mandatory evacuated about an hour after I left, it seems. I have no idea if my other 2 cousins have gotten out.
At 6AM I decide it’s late enough and I call my Aunt closest to the Wild Animal Park. She’s sleeping, but my Uncle answers. He says he’s watching the news, but it’s still a few miles away and he’s going to work. An hour later, the news reports that the freeways are closing, the fires are spreading at breakneck speeds, and have split off into multiple heads. I text my boss and my Super Secret KGB Assistant and tell them not to come to work, that I’m safe, etc….my boss calls me immediately, having no idea what’s going on. KGB Assistant texts back that she still wants to work because she needs the hours, so I ask my boss to call her and force her to stay home.
Later in the afternoon, the neighborhood north of JS is mandatorily evacuated. Del Mar is under voluntary evacuation. My boss has already offered her place to us and the dog, but now she calls and simply says “You and JS need to decide to come here, OK?” So we pack up, again, and head to La Jolla. We take the same car, because I don’t want to be separated.
At bedtime on Monday night, I break into uncontrollable sobs against JS’s chest. There’s just too much going on, and I wasn’t prepared for this. And I was flip, at first. I thought everything was going to be OK, and now I don’t know if it is. I finally fall asleep, and have dreams about flames and running away.
TUESDAY
I call my Aunt again. They’ve been evacuated and are going to Carlsbad. If I want to join them, I can. I’m torn because I don’t want to leave JS, and I want to be with family. Turns out that the choice is an easy one, cause the roads are still closed. So I stay in La Jolla. My other Aunt, the one I couldn’t reach, has also evacuated and she and her family are all safe, even the cousins who didn’t answer the phone on Sunday night. I get more calls from friends and my parents, making sure I’m OK.
WEDNESDAY
I’ve been wearing the same clothes for days. My feet are absolutely filthy. I cannot get the soot out of them, no matter how hard I scrub. Tonks is just loving all of the attention she’s getting from the extra people in her house, and she’s terrorizing my boss’s elderly dog. But, she’s behaving like an over all angel, no accidents inside, much less biting. My friend offers to send me a package of clothes. I want to say no, but I can’t because I need them. So I swallow my pride tell her where to send them.
THURSDAY
We’re supposed to go to work. I don’t know why. More than half a million people are still evacuated, and many of them not lucky enough to have friends/family to stay with and thus staying at stadiums or fair grounds. That and the office is less than 2 miles from the mandatory evacuation sites. Still, I go in with my boss and JS. We dont’ stay long. The air is horrendous.
After work JS and I decide to go to a mall. It’s a two birds with one stone sort of deal. We can distract ourselves, and we can get a few supplies. I buy a few pairs of underwear and socks. I also get 1 pair of jeans, a T-shirt, and a skirt, in case I have to work again. It’s all on clearance because I’m quickly running out of money.
I also call my insurance company to tell them I was evacuated. They tell me to track my expenses and they’ll be in touch with what to do if my property is damaged. I also FINALLY get my inhaler from the pharmacy. When I cough, I sometimes spit up mouth-fulls of dark phlegm. JS had a nasty bloody nose the night before.
FRIDAY
I really want to go see my family. I call my Aunt. She’s back home! And my cousins have gone back home! The evacuation is lifted. I rush home, with the dog, JS right behind me because I’m terrified of what I’ll see. He helps me unload the car and the dog. Everything is much better than I could have ever hoped for. JS takes off for his house, and I once again break into sobs, this time into the puppy’s fur. She licks the tears off my face and then tries to bite my nose. The insurance calls back and works with me to get a check in mail for what I’ve had to spend thus far.
And that brings us to the weekend, which is now. And all is much better. It’s still weird. I’ve slept a lot, and gotten teary a few times. But KNOWING that everything is OK is much better than HOPING that everything will be OK.
I just wish that everyone else were as fortunate as I was.